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Thanks for sharing your experience, and thanks particularly for your Epilogue. 7 weeks ago, my girlfriend of a little over a year broke off our relationship. It appears that this time, (she broke it off on several previous occasions), it's likely for real. She has been in therapy for a few years and determined last year that she had "mild" BPD. Some months ago she directed me to "The Shack" website so that I could understand her better. I read it all, but ignored the warnings because I loved her so much and had to believe that she was on the road to recovery. Hopefully she is, but apparently not recovered enough to sustain our relationship. It comforts me to know I'm not alone with these feelings. I try to hope someday to find someone who has learned as much as I have about how to have a good relationship. Sadly, most of the time I wait in the hope that she'll overcome her disorder and want what I thought we could have together.

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Thank you so much for your brave account. So much of what you have written describes the relationship I am having (and trying to get out of) with my emotionally abusive boyfriend. I have only just found out about BPD - I got your URL from SWOE. I realise I have to take control of myself - your letter confirms many things I have been thinking about and been confused about for the last 9 months. Thank you. I wish you well.

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keep up the good work regards peter

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I never heard the word Narcisizum before until i went to a Pyscic and she told me that my husband has those symtoms. I suffered 24 years of his abuse and i met a wonderful man 3 years ago that i am absolutley crazy about and have gone through some horrible hurt feelings through these 3 years and i think he has this personality disorder. I don't know what to do because i have given everything up for him and now i am stuck with nothing to try and get back on my feet.

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Last entry has incorrect email address! Please use this one! Thanks!

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Your letter has been a godsend. Thank you so much. I have been in a confused haze of a relationship for years and am just now starting to feel sane by reading about BPD. I am in the middle of possibly ending the relationship and would like to correspond with anyone going through the same thing and wanting peer support.

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Thanks!

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I was married to a BDP for 24yrs (undiagnosed) and then my first relationship lasting 14 months was with another.Now I understand from WEB information!Four years ago had a breakdowm because of my ex wife's BDP crap and it nearly buried me. Never again!I'm nearly sorted now and it's taken all my strength but I've got there. Best wishes to all those non BDP out there.