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Well i cant believe it has nearly been a year, i thought i would never make it this far but some how i have pulled through and made it. The year that was the worst of my life has passed and now i continue to remember the days leading up to my partners death. They say the first year is always the hardest and by far it is, somehow i have pulled through but times there i wanted to give up. I miss John so much and wish he would come back knowing though that will never happen, i remember the times we spent together and how we laughed at times i hug my pillow thinking it of him, if only i could see him smile once more and hold me one more time i think i could cope that little bit better. Time is tough and this week is going to be one of the toughest of my life. I miss you John, i hope your watching over me and that your proud, cos im proud of you my angel.

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i was looking for help so i could greive the loss of my husband who committed suicide only 4 weeks ago. i have been finding it quite difficult. i dont know who else to call and my aunty said about your website. it is great to see help out there.

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As the year draws to a close i begin to reflect on how bad this year has been, not only did i lose the love of my life but everything else just seem to go wrong. It didnt just rain, it poured. As the one year mark comes closer i feel more and more depressed, i guess i still havent fully accepted the loss of my partner. As people in the world celebrate christmas i reflect back to last year when everything seemed fine but it was just fire smuldgering in the ground that eventually flaired up in january. This year has passed so quick and it seems that i am no closer to finding closure. This is the worst tragedy anyone has to go through, i wish i hadnt experianced this at all and that my partner was still here. Wishing you all out there a merry christmas and know that you are not alone in your sadness that comes these 'happy' times of year.

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i have read all of the personal stories on this website, and some of those in this guest book. i just wanted to give my deepest of sympathies to all you who have lost someone dear to you. it is very brave of you to share your experiences.